The biggest networking mistake you’re probably making
We’ve all been there.
You’re at a networking event, trying to make meaningful connections, and then he shows up—the business card guy. You know the type. He’s not listening, not engaging, just tossing out cards like he’s dealing blackjack at a Vegas casino.
Let me tell you a secret: nobody remembers the card guy. They remember the problem-solver, the connector, the person who actually listened.
If you want to win at networking, stop handing out cards and start building real connections. Here’s how.
Why the Card Game is a Losing Game
The problem with business card guy is simple: he’s focused on quantity, not quality.
He’s there to collect as many names as possible, hoping something will stick. But here’s the truth: networking isn’t about how many people you meet—it’s about how many remember you for the right reasons.
People don’t care about your card. They care about the conversation, the value you bring, and whether you made an effort to help them.
The Real Secret to Winning at Networking
The best networkers don’t talk about themselves—they solve problems. They’re the ones people gather around at events, not because they’re flashy but because they’re valuable.
Here’s how to stop being the card guy and start being the person everyone wants to talk to:
1. Listen More Than You Speak
The easiest way to stand out in a room full of talkers? Be the listener.
Most people are so eager to pitch their story or sell their services that they forget to listen. But listening is your superpower. It makes people feel valued and understood, and it helps you uncover opportunities to help.
How to Do It:
Ask open-ended questions.
Let the other person talk about their challenges, goals, or pain points.
Resist the urge to jump in with your pitch.
Pro Tip: When you listen, people will naturally ask about you. That’s your moment to shine—after you’ve made it about them.
2. Ask Powerful Questions
Forget the boring small talk. Go deeper.
When you ask the right questions, you create instant connections. You move the conversation from surface-level chit-chat to meaningful dialogue.
Try This Question:
“What’s the biggest challenge in your business right now?”
This question does two things: it shows you’re genuinely interested in helping, and it opens the door for you to offer real value.
3. Be the Problem-Solver
Once you’ve listened and uncovered a challenge, don’t just nod and move on. Offer help.
Help doesn’t mean selling your services—it means adding value in a way that’s relevant to them. It could be:
Introducing them to someone in your network.
Suggesting a strategy or tool they can use.
Sharing an idea that might help them move forward.
Why This Works:
People remember the person who solved their problem, even in a small way. It’s the easiest way to leave a lasting impression.
4. Make It About Them, Not You
The card guy makes it all about himself—his pitch, his services, his agenda. Winners flip the script.
Instead of trying to sell yourself, focus on the other person’s needs. What can you do to help them succeed?
The Result:
When people feel supported and valued, they’re more likely to trust you, recommend you, and even hire you down the line.
Why This Approach Works
Networking isn’t about numbers—it’s about connection. When you focus on listening, solving problems, and creating value, you stand out in a sea of business card tossers.
The best part? This approach builds relationships that last. And relationships, not random connections, are what drive real business growth.
Your Action Plan to Win at Networking
Here’s how to put this into practice at your next event:
Be the Listener: Ask questions and let the other person share their story.
Ask About Their Challenges: Use the question, “What’s the biggest challenge in your business right now?” to open up the conversation.
Offer Real Help: Whether it’s advice, a resource, or an introduction, give them something valuable.
Follow Up: After the event, send a quick message or email to reinforce the connection.
Final Thought: Be the Value Person
Here’s the deal: nobody remembers the guy who handed out 50 business cards and talked about himself all night. But they’ll never forget the person who listened, cared, and helped solve a problem.
So, the next time you’re networking, skip the card game and focus on creating connections that matter.