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New Year’s Resolutions Are A Huge JOKE — Stop Making Them Right Now

If you’re making New Year’s Resolutions – just stop right now. They’re not helping you, they may only be hurting you. And ultimately, most people give up on them in 8 days.

Want to do something that is more effective instead, and is way more powerful at helping you grow toward the level you want to achieve in your life and business? I’ll share with you exactly what to do in this blog post…

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Here’s The DM and Deena celebrating New Years (a few years ago)… NO RESOLUTIONS!

HERE’S WHY RESOLUTIONS ARE BROKEN

 

Most people make New Year’s resolutions at the beginning of the year.

“I want to make more money”
“I want to lose weight”
… and so on.

And maybe they even get ultra-specific and say, “I’m going to go to the gym every day” or “I’m going to quit smoking.”

This seems to be a smart thing to do. But is it?

According to an article by the Washington Post, a quarter of people give up their New Year’s resolutions by the first week of January. And the same article quotes research that reveals: approximately half of resolution-setters give up by March. And an article published in Forbes reports that only 8% of people who set resolutions actually achieve them.

New Year’s Resolutions don’t work.

But do you know WHY they don’t work? I’ll tell you: It has nothing to do with the date you set, or even how much you think you want the goal. It usually has to do with how much work is involved in setting that resolution.

For example, the big joke among regular gym-goers is that you need to skip the gym during the first week of January because that’s when EVERYBODY goes. But after the first week, you can start going back again because only the serious people remain.

“It’s Easy to Start but to keep consistent and get to your goal is where people fail.”

Unless you’re one of the rare 8% who actually achieves your resolutions, stop wasting time setting goals and resolutions if you’re not willing to do the work.

Does that mean you should just carry on like normal and treat January 1 the same as every other day of the year? Heck no. Let me show you what I do (and what you should do instead). This is very powerful and you’ll see in a moment how life-changing it can be…

In fact, I don’t believe you should treat ANY day like normal! We can (and should) live each day to the fullest, maximizing what we get out of life. After all, we only have one life to live so let’s make the most of it. (I’ll bet the 8% who are making resolutions and keeping them have BIG things going on in life).

HERE’S THE ONE QUESTION I ALWAYS ASK MYSELF…

 

Stop making resolutions… start asking yourself this 1 question...

Stop making resolutions… start asking yourself this 1 question…

At the beginning of the year (and, actually, throughout the year too) I ask myself one question: “What can I add into my life or business to grow it so I can have more time?

Let me break this down for you…

What can I add…” – Notice how I ask what I can ADD. Most people spend their time trying to figure out how to take away, how to spend less, how to do less. They’re busy cutting expenses and pinching pennies. Hey, I’m all for spending wisely but I rarely do anything to cut expenses (unless it’s an obvious waste that doesn’t contribute to my business or life). Instead, I’m looking for things I can add. For example, I constantly try to figure out how to add more relationships (and better relationships), more team members, more opportunities, more deals, more streams of income. I want more because more helps you grow.

… into my life or business…” – I ask this question about both my life and my business. I mention both of those things because they’re related. I build a business using systems and a team so that I can have more time to do what I want. Too many people try to separate “work and life” or strike some kind of balance. But not me. I want to build total imbalance: a business that requires almost NO work on my part so I can spend more time on the non-business portion of my life.

“… to grow it so I can have more time?” – This is what it’s all about. Growth for time. If it’s not growing then I’m at risk of allowing my business and life to stagnate, so I want them to grow: I want to build each so I leave a powerful legacy that will impact future generations. And right now, I want more time – because time is the real measure of wealth. (Too many small-minded people think MONEY is the measure of wealth but it’s not… TIME is and that’s what money buys you). Time allows you to do the things you want and need to do. Want to focus on your health? Time allows you to go to the gym, do yoga, etc.

As you can see, this is a powerful question that is full of deeper meaning. When I ask it and then think carefully about the answer, I always come up with a big list of exciting strategies and ideas that will contribute to my life and the lives of those around me.

But I don’t just stop there (because if I did, nothing would happen)…

BE SURE TO ASK THESE 2 FOLLOW-UP QUESTIONS

 

If you just ask and answer the question, you’d be no better off than if you make New Year’s resolutions. Simply put, the answer itself to the question above will only reveal what needs to happen. Now you need to go one layer deeper to know what to do…

So there’s a follow-up question I always ask: “What needs to be in place or what do I need to build or invest in, in order to achieve that plan?

This is huge. And the answer will be your to-do list for the coming year. In fact, I ask this question WEEKLY (and so should you).

I’ll use an example to illustrate. Let’s say you’ve asked the first question:

“What can I add into my life or business to grow it so I can have more time?” And you decide that you want to meet more people to grow your network.

Cool. Now you ask yourself the follow-up question…

What needs to be in place or what do I need to build or invest in, in order to achieve that plan?” The answers turn into your to-do list. In this example, let’s say you want the following:

  • Something of value to give to people (i.e. a book or a valuable piece of information)
  • A way to build relationships (i.e. an email management system)
  • A plan so that he relationship has somewhere to go
  • A “channel” or “vehicle” to actually meet people (i.e. a Real Estate Investing Association group or a Facebook page)

(Of course the real answer might be much longer and more detailed but this is good enough for an example).

Now that you’ve asked the first and second question, you have a list of things to implement to achieve that bigger network.

HERE’S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I ASK THESE QUESTIONS…

 

In my life, I ask this question and the follow-up question all the time (at the beginning of the year and throughout the year as well) and the answers often include building systems and building a team.

In fact, my team is growing all the time and THEY’RE implementing systems to grow even more. The result? My business is growing bigger and bigger and, at the same time, it’s requiring less and less of my attention.

Giving me more time to spend with Deena and Mark III.

SOMETHING POWERFUL HAPPENS WHEN YOU ASK THESE QUESTIONS…

 

When you ask these questions, something very powerful happens.

You ask BETTER QUESTIONS (questions that really matter) and you discover BETTER ANSWERS (answers that lead to life-changing activities).

You’ll discover powerful strategies and actions to do more this next year than you’ve done in previous years – to help others, to build a legacy, to do more deals, to create more cash flow, and to grow your business and life to a greater degree than ever before.

Your friend and mentor

Mark Evans DM,DN

PS, Head over to my page on Facebook and tell me what the answer is to this question when YOU ask it for your life and business!

FamilyDM

As I Held My Son In My Arms, I Saw A Facebook Post That Shocked Me…

On August 19, Deena gave birth to our son, Mark Evans III. (Check out these awesome pics on my Facebook page and be sure to like the page to get some great info and the occasional adorable pic of Mark III).

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The DM jr. … dreaming of making deals!

As you can imagine, I’m pretty excited and the little guy has already inspired me to level up my game even further (plus he amped up my motivation to do even more deals to provide an amazing life for him).

While sitting there holding him in my arms, I was just feeling so thankful and thinking about how there are millions of kids in the world who wouldn’t be born into a family that had all the privileges and advantages that he had.

Then, almost as if the universe heard my thoughts, I saw post on Facebook about Hope To Haiti (a non-profit organization that does amazing work in Haiti). They talked about how there was a school in Haiti where the children had to sit on a hard cement floor in order to learn. (Some of the kids couldn’t go to school at all.)

Now, I didn’t love school but I was fortunate enough to have a desk and chair. And when Mark III goes to school, he’s going to have a desk and chair too. But these kids in Haiti WANTED to learn and SHOWED UP to school but had to endure a lot of discomfort. Wow.

Little DM looked up at me and it was like he was telling me to do something about it.

So Deena and I and Mark III talked about it (well, Mark III didn’t contribute a lot to the conversation — lol) and we decided then and there to donate the materials so desks and benches could be built for those students.

Here’s the really cool reply we just heard back from Hope To Haiti

(Source: This information was written by Hope To Haiti and published in their newsletter)

– – – – – – – –

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Hope To Haiti

I want to say a special thank you to the Preston Scott Morning Show on100.7FM Tallahassee, Florida. He along with my dear friend Dr. Ed Moore, put out a challenge to Preston’s listeners to donate for this cause. They raised enough funds for thirteen benches !!!

I also wanted to share this story. It is amazing who we are able to reach when our friends that receive our newsletters and FaceBook posts SHARE and then repost or forward a friend. We often receive support from people we have never had any interactions with beforehand.

One of H2H’s number one fans is Doug Doebler, we have been friends for almost eight years. He is a member of the Caring House Foundation’s Board of Directors, and is always quick to forward my emails to others within his network.

When Doug saw our need for the school desks, he posted it on his FaceBook page. His friend Mark Evans saw the need and immediately pledge support for an entire school!!!

From Doug, here is Evan’s story…..

H2H Donors and Palm Beach Residents Mark and Deena Evans were blessed with a healthy baby boy, Mark III, on August 19, 2015. Just hours after watching his son enter the world, Mark saw a Facebook post that H2H desired to provide new school benches/desks for the Guernsey Family Village multi purpose building we recently built with The Caring House Project Foundation.

The Facebook caught Mark’s attention because the School/Church/Community Center is located near St. Marc in Haiti — a country Mark had visited in 2007. During that trip, Mark was shocked at the conditions there, and although much progress has been made in Haiti, there is always more to do and Haiti has always remained close to Mark’s heart. So Mark and Deena sent a note to H2H that they were so grateful to have their first child, a bouncing baby boy born in the good old USA, and they wanted to do something special to honor the birth of their son.

Providing the funds for new school benches sounded like a great idea. Less than 30 days later, the benches are built and in use in the new School/Church/Community Center building.

Thank you Mark, Deena & Mark III for your generosity.

FamilyDM

Deena, Mark III, and The DM

Check out these pics of the desks and benches being built…

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The lumber was bought locally

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Haitian locals were hired to build the benches and desks

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It’s coming together!

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The kids are trying them out

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I think they seem pretty happy

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Yep! These kids are ready to learn!

– – – – – – – –

Here’s how the DM feels about school…

I wasn’t great in school. I never went to college. And the truth is, I think college degrees are often overrated (although definitely necessary sometimes… I’m glad that the doctor who helped Deena give birth had a degree!)

But the value of school, especially in the formative years for children, is so powerful. Kids drink up information and they also benefit from the discipline and routine of school plus the exposure to information that they might not get if they didn’t go to school.

I may not have been a stellar student but when Mark III grows up, you can be sure that I’m putting him into a great school with the best support he can get. I won’t have an expectation that he’ll get a degree but I’ll make sure he doesn’t blow off school either.

And I firmly believe that if Haiti is going develop as a nation, it will be because their children had the invaluable benefits of education… and I’m thrilled that my family of 3 can contribute to the education of 150 Haitian kids, and to the future of Haiti.

Your friend and mentor
Mark Evans DM,DN

PS, I also encourage you to give. You can get more information and arrange a donation to Hope To Haiti at http://www.hopetohaiti.com.

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One Of The Most Powerful And Emotional Things I’ve Ever Done

It’s a Wrap!

My parents were in town this past weekend, and with this in mind, I hired a videographer to interview them.

Why would I do this?

It actually goes back to 2005…

October 8, 2005 was one of the saddest days of my life. It’s the day that I lost my grandmother to stage 4 lung cancer.

I remember the day I got the call from my parents telling me that grandma had cancer. She had gone into the hospital for a routine check-up and discovered that she had cancer. It was dramatically advanced and she only had 2 weeks to live.

My heart sank and I fell to the ground in my office and wondered, “how the HELL could this happen?” It was a mix of emotion. I felt shock, sadness, regret, helplessness – I loved this wonderful woman.

Did I tell her how much I loved her? Did I remind her often enough how much she meant to me? Did we spend as much time together as we could have spent, doing the things she enjoyed? Did she know how thankful I was for her and the impact she had on my life?

I dropped everything, got into my car and drove to her, just to get by her side to spend as much time as possible with her.

I wish you could meet my grandmother…

Her name was Reah and I was fortunate enough to know her for most of my life, and especially to spend much of her last days with her. On October 8, 2005, she lost her life to cancer but the memories we shared together live on: Growing up near her, I literally would stay all night with her for weeks on end just sitting around watching TV, putting puzzles together, making candles, sharing stories about my grandpa Ben and how hard he worked to raise the family. She was a good ole’ fashion genuinely great person.

Here’s an awesome picture of my grandmother Reah and her sister in a limo I rented for her to go to the family Christmas party. This was the first time she was in a limo and I’m thankful I was able to do this for her. It was a huge hit at the family Christmas party. (I’m so thankful that I didn’t put this off just to save a few bucks. Some folks look at the money plus they put things off to avoid spending money but this was a lifetime memory and the money I spent didn’t matter because the memory was priceless.)


My Grandmother Reah and her Sister Betty in the Limo compliments of The DM :)

So, why am I fighting back the tears and writing this to you? Why am I sharing about the saddest day of my life?

I was recently in a meeting with a great guy named Jim who had a similar story with one of his relatives. We were talking about life and I told him about my grandmother He then mentioned something he’d read by Brendon Burchard – an author, speaker, and trainer (who is probably most famous for his books The Millionaire Messenger and The Charge.) So I checked out what Brendan wrote…

Turns out, like many other people, Brendon also lost someone to cancer and he recognized that losing someone doesn’t have to mean losing their message and wisdom and love and memory. Like me, he knew that we should celebrate the person’s life for as long as they are with us and preserve their legacy after they’re gone. So he put together a list of interview questions and urged his audience to interview their loved ones as a way to get to know them better and to preserve the important things they have to say.

A record of wisdom and love

Inspired from his thinking, I put together my own questions that I would ask if I were interviewing a loved one. I wish I’d interviewed my grandmother before she passed. I would have a video that I could watch and share with my family.

Could you imagine having a video from your great, great grandparents discussing their life story? It’s as if they reach through time and speak directly to you! Their story could help explain and shape who you are and potentially could become! It’s an influential notion many of us wish we had access to but unfortunately don’t.

Although I never was able to record an interview with my grandmother, I do have an audio that I created for my grandmother in which I told her how much she meant to me. It was recorded on an old fashioned tape deck and it took me all day to create the audio and then I would sit beside her bed – just her and I – and I pressed play and then I held her hand as we both cried and smiled and laughed. I’m so thankful I was able to put the words on audio for her as I know she knew how much she meant to me.

I have an audio of my thoughts for my grandmother but I don’t have a video of her sharing her life and wisdom, and I feel like I’m really missing something important from her! I don’t ever want to make that mistake again with any other loved one. I want to learn from my family and I want to preserve their love and lessons for myself, my family, and generations to come.

That’s why I hired a videographer to interview my parents, which we did when they were visiting recently.

The interview was emotional but I learned so much more about my parents and it was a perfect opportunity to tell them how much they mean to me.

Here are some pictures from that experience.


Palm Beach, FL March 23rd 2015, my mother being interviewed


Palm Beach, FL March 23rd 2015, my father being interviewed

If you need help getting started, I’ve listed several questions at the bottom of this blog post that you can use. Change them up or use them as-is.

Your legacy-building friend,

Mark Evans DM,DN

PS, whether you decide to do one or both, I urge you to do them soon. As I learned with my grandmother, we don’t know how long we have on this earth so make the most of the time you have with your loved ones now. Tomorrow is never guaranteed!

PS, the same lesson goes for you, too: You don’t know how long YOU have on this earth. So make sure you tell your loved ones that you love them, and make sure you make the most out of every single day. If I have a legacy I want to share with this world, it’s this… Live life to the fullest. Do the things you love with the people you love. Don’t waste a moment!
 
 
 

QUESTIONS TO ANSWER WHEN RECORDING A MESSAGE TO YOUR LOVED ONE

Here are some questions that I wrote down to answer when I did my recording for my grandmother. You may need to modify this slightly, depending on who you are talking to…

1. [Name], we are here and I’m so thankful for this opportunity to be able to do this. I have a lot I want to share with you.
2. I wanted to share with you some of my most memorable memories I’ve had with you…
3. I wanted to let you know how thankful I am of you…
4. I wanted to share how you made me feel…
5. I wanted to share with you how special you are to me…
6. I always laugh out loud when I think of… (have them talk about times we had together)
7. I will carry out anything you need me to do in my life and pass the torch on… (What do you want me to carry out on your behalf?)
8. Thank you for being such a great inspiration/ person to me…

QUESTIONS TO ASK YOUR LOVED ONE WHEN RECORDING AN INTERVIEW WITH THEM

Below is a list of questions that you can ask your loved ones. Some of these questions may need to be edited slightly, depending on who they are, and some questions may need to be repeated (such as if you’re asking about siblings and you have several). In some questions, I’ve also added additional clarifying questions in parentheses so you can prompt your interviewee to help them broaden their answer.

Credit: Brendon Burchard created his own list and that list inspired mine. A couple of the questions are similar but I’ve created my own list of questions below. Want to give credit to Brendan for the inspiration.

TIP: I recommend that you hire a professional videographer to help you create a high-quality video that will be cherished and watched over and over.

You can record this in any of the following ways:

  • Be there in person (I would love to do this but I’d start crying on the first questions. Truthfully not everyone is like this of course.)
  • If you’re far away from this person, call in on a speaker phone and ask the questions while they are being interviewed.
  • Or, have the videographer ask the questions and when they finish recording the answers, they can edit you asking the questions. (This is what I did)

Also, you should always have the person you’re interviewing re ask the question. Example:

YOU: “Where were you born and where did you grow up?”
THEM: “Where was I born and where did I grow up? [and then the answer]

Questions
1. State your name.
2. Tell me the date and year you were born.
3. Where were you born and where did you grow up?
4. Describe what your life was like growing up.
5. Tell me about your parents.
6.What do you remember most about your mother?
7. What do you remember most about your father?
8. How did your parents meet?
9. If they had a message to share with their grandchildren, what would it be?
10. What are your fondest memories of your childhood?
11. What are your fondest memories of your teenage years?
12. Tell me about how you met your spouse. (Where did you meet? How did you meet? How did you know they were the one you wanted to marry?)
13. How would you describe your spouse?
14. Tell me about your career. (How did you choose that career? What made you successful at it?)
15. Tell me about some of the best times in your life.
16. Tell me about some of the most difficult times in your life.
17. What helped you get through the difficult times?
18. What events in your life do you think most shaped your life?
19. How did having children change your life?
20. Tell me about what life was like when you had each child. (Repeat this question for every child the person had.)
21. How would you describe the life you lived?
22. What do you want to be remembered for?
23. What are your fondest memories in life, overall?
24. What are you most proud of in life?
25. If you could go back and do it all over again, what would you do differently?
26. If you could make any change to the world, what would it be?
27. What message would you like to share with your family?
28. What things do you want me to pursue in the future on your behalf to keep your legacy living?

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